


Memory

by Jane0Doe



Series: The Fae are Watching [2]
Category: Faerie Folklore, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Abusive Dursley Family, BAMF Harry Potter, Child Abuse, Creature Harry Potter, Dumbledore Bashing, Dursley Bashing, Faeries - Freeform, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Magically Powerful Harry Potter, Mythical Beings & Creatures, No Horcruxes, Pain, Parselmouth Harry Potter, Seer Harry Potter, Self-Harm, Sweet Harry Potter, but only the past, fairfolk, fey
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-06-06 08:46:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15191111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jane0Doe/pseuds/Jane0Doe
Summary: Memory is a funny thing. So is Blood.Even when people forget, their blood remembers.It burns and it churns but it remembers everything that lead to this moment.Harry rather likes blood. even if it his own that is spilled.It doesn't lie and its always willing to show him the truth.





	1. Petunia

Petunia hated her nephew.

 

She hated his eyes. 

Not just because they were the same **FREAKISH** \- _different, bright, Avada Kedavra, otherworldly, beautiful, wonderful, magical_ \- green as her sisters. 

But, because even as a babe it - _he, they, **FREAK** , waste, **BOY** , never harry, never human, never worthy _ \- looked as if it were staring into her soul - _peeling back layers, stealing secrets, finding truths, none of her lies would be believed, **HE JUST NEW!** Evil little devil spawn _ \- and seeing everything she was. 

The feeling of being stripped to the bone - _ravenous, hungry, constant_ \- whenever he looked at her made her skin crawl. It made forgetting what he, _**IT**_ was all the more impossible.

 

She hated the fact he had been left on HER doorstep just like Lily - _beautiful, strange, bright, Other_ \- had been left on her parent’s door step.

The symmetry would almost be poetic, if it wasn’t for the fact that Petunia didn’t want it, not like her parents had, - _oh how they’d begged, and pleaded, and prayed. Just one more child, just one more. So desperate that they’d let a **FREAK** like her, **IT** into their home with open arms, refusing to see the monster within. _

She did not want this creature in human form. Who moved with the predatory stillness and grace that his mother had. That smiled the same broken - _jagged, vicious, more, possessive, cruel, sharp, kind, OTHER… so, so, like the Sidhe he came from_ \- smile full of teeth and pain. 

She took a near gleeful pleasure, in using chores and Vernon to add the pain in his smile - _precious, miraculous Lily had never been taught her place, she was far too **SPECIAL**. Only she had seen the **FREAK** within. _

 

But most of all, though she would never admit it, she hated him because he had **MAGICK** \- _power, sorcery, divination, witch craft, SIGHT, wizardry, voodoo, devilry._

He had what she had always wanted.

Desire turned to Jealousy. Jealousy turned to Hate. Hate Turned to Fear.

He had power, but he didn’t understand it - _not **yet** _ \- so she would make him feel powerless and helpless - _like she was; always afraid, envious, jealous, fearful… why wasn’t it hers! She deserved it, not the little monster_ \- for as long as she could. 

She would make him suffer. After all, it was only what he deserved.


	2. Remembrance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry remembered. He remembered everything.
> 
>  
> 
> (Harry is about 3 1/2 to 4 years old)

Harry remembered.

 

He remembered his mother’s voice as she sang him to sleep _-a lilting tone that was beautiful and inhuman in a way that simply mesmerised all who heard. She was always so bright and ethereal._

He had always believed as a babe that nothing could hurt her. Even when the man caked in foulness had come.

It was only when she fell, unmoving, that he realised the truth. 

Death came for everyone in the end.

 

He remembered his father grinning as he created colourful bubbles to make Harry laugh _-he was so bright, burning with passion and joy._

And the laughter. So much laughter. He revelled in his mortality. 

Unlike so many others, he recognised that his time was finite and he lived for every moment. 

Be they Happy or Sad. Joyful or Painful. Every moment mattered.

Harry wasn’t surprised that he died.  
Only that it happened so soon.

 

He remembered his uncle Padfoot letting him fly on a broom _–after mother Padfoot was his favourite._

There was just something oh so feral _-wild, free, more, mad-_ about him that spoke to him. He knew mother had felt the same. Even if she had claimed daddy as her own.

He sometimes wondered where Padfoot had gone. Never for long though.

Something always told him that it wasn’t time to focus on that yet.

And Harry **ALWAYS** trusted his instincts. 

 

He remembered Moony- _he hadn’t really liked him._

He was always so restrained _–trapped, caged, scared, **Subjugated** , imprisoned– _ and Harry **Hated** it. 

He hated it that something that had had so much potential had been collared. The fact that Moony had so obviously done it to himself, only made it worse.

Harry didn’t really care that moony was gone. 

 

He even remembered the rat man who stank of fear and cowardice. 

**BETRAYER**. That was what mother had called him when they were alone.

Harry never understood why she stayed, when she knew what he was going to do.

 

Was it loyalty to his father? 

Or had she known something that no one else did?

 

Was it Fate that kept her there,  
knowing that death was coming and could not be outrun?

 

Whatever it was, that night was nothing but a memory now.

Filled with flashes of green that were burned into his mind. And red. So. much. _RED._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol hope this is alright as it literally came to me on the bus and so I wrote it in my note book and well here it is.
> 
> hope the grammar and spelling isn't terrible
> 
> I'm relying heavily on google and word


	3. The Shadows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shadows are everywhere. 
> 
> We see them every day. 
> 
> So much so that we never really pay attention to them.  
> Perhaps we should. 
> 
> After all, they are a state of in-between. Not quite darkness, but definitely not light.
> 
> And it is in these places of in-between that doorways can be opened.  
> Allowing Something, to creep through.

Harry loves the Shadows.

Perhaps it’s a result of how much time he spends locked in his cupboard, with nothing but the darkness to keep him company.

Perhaps it’s because of the way that the Shadows will hide him sometimes when he's running from Dudley. Making it appear to all as if he was never there.

Perhaps, and this is the most likely reason of all, it was because they were his friends.

Just like the snakes that hissed and spoke with him in the garden, the Shadows would whisper to him when he was alone.

They spoke of something Other, something Else and something Better.

At night, when the Dursleys slumbered and Things prowled the streets during the Witching hours. The Shadows would whisper to him. 

 

Sometimes they would tell him stories of his mother and the realm she came from. 

They told him of the boundless fields that were a constant throughout the Realms of Faerie and how they were filled with flowers. Some flowers sang. Some flowers produced scents that addled the mind and ensnared the senses trapping wanderers for decades or centuries at a time. Some were carnivorous and would try to eat the foolish that wandered too close. They would also whisper sparingly of creatures such as _Nargles_ and _Heliopaths_ that lived within these fields, occasionally visiting the mortal realm in hopes of causing mayhem and confusion. 

They murmured him of the gaping chasm that littered the borders of the Unseelie court, filled with shadows, madness and Whispermen. Beings that would lure foolish mortals who managed to get into faerie down, down, down into the earth and to their deaths. Or so it was assumed. One had to wonder **WHERE** exactly the Whispermen came from. They weren’t exactly of the fey after all… 

They whisper to him, in hushed near reverent tones, of the Unseelie court itself. How it was currently situated within a gilded palace that seemed to grow out of the mountain itself, decadent and simply Other in its beauty. The walls were hung with living darkness and the ceilings decorated with garlands made from silver and spiders’ silk that shone like moonbeams. Creeping vines that were embedded with gems grew throughout the palaces, glowing softly with captured moonlight and dragons fire. They cast shadows that moved when you looked at them from the corner of your eye. The Unseelie court was near monstrous in its beauty as unlike the Seelie court its inhabitants were not as contrary in their nature so felt no need to conceal their sharp edges. Both figuratively and literally, if the court garden filled with razor-sharp ice that the Shadows once mentioned was to be considered.

They even whispered to him in halting tones about the Seelie court. (you must understand that it was not that they did not Like the Seelie, _Far From It_ , but that they were not of that court so simply did not know). They spoke of a land much like Alice’s wonderland. If Alice’s wonderland had been as deadly and beautiful as it was contrary. The Seelie and Unseelie both enjoyed games, it was in their nature. But the Seelie often brought it to a whole new level. Revelling in the confusion their lands brought to the ill-prepared mortals and humans that managed to wander in through ancient gateways. 

When Harry asked them if he would ever get to see this realm that was his own through blood, the Shadows would coalesce around him in a type of hug and softly tell him in a voice rich with promise - _and something far more ominous_ \- that someone was coming to find him, and that they would return him to the fey soon enough.  
Strangely, this always made Harry feel warm inside.

 

Sometimes, they spoke to him of his father and the world of mortal magick that he came from.

They whispered, tones edging near disapproval but not quite there, of a society where perceived blood superiority was used to measure ones standing and place within over convoluted social structures. Blood IS important, they murmur, it can be a great source of power to those who understand it. But the way they judge it is Wrong and based upon lies that have no foundation.

They told him of his place within their society. Of the titles they bestowed him. Of the reverent way in which they worshipped him. They mocked the way in which the Wizards and Witchling’s society looked upon him as a God, all the while unaware and uncaring of how he lived. Harry had once asked if it was not his society as well, inherited through his father just as the faerie realms claimed him through his mother. And oh, how they’d laughed. “Hussssh Little Treasure” they’d crooned “you are not theirs, you are meant for somewhere else.” He hadn’t asked again, understanding on some level that this was not meant be explain yet.

They hissed of a man who sat upon a throne of belief - _the most dangerous kind of all_ \- watching over the world of mortal magic and crafting it in his own design. They scorned the man whose tong dripped with honeyed lies, as he manipulated the minds of the young and impressionable. Melding them, shaping them, and in some cases forcibly **CHANGING** them so that they could be used as chess pieces for a game that not even the fey understood the point of. All Fairfolk love games, they would explain soothingly, but there are rules, rules that should never be broken.

They even told him of how this society truly came to be. Not the lies that their forebearers had told for so long that they actually believed them! No, not that. They whispered to him of a time when the fey were at the brink of oblivion. The gene pool too small. The fey would live, but no more would be born. They would stagnate, a fate far worse than death. Eventually, an idea came about, no one can remember exactly who came up with it. It was proposed that they should mate with the mortal creatures and see what came of it. If nothing else, it would be amusing.

From the union with reptiles came Wyverns, Dragons, Basilisks, Snakes, Hydras, Runespoors, Horned Serpents and Cockatrice.

From the union with Bats came the Chupacabra’s.

From the unions with the aquatic species came all manner of Sea Dragons, Firecrabs, Hippocampuses, Kappas and Grindylows.

From the union with Cats came Kneazles, Sphinxes, Wampuses, Griffins, Shadow Panthers, Manticore, Chimera and Nemean Lions.

From the union with Dogs came Crups, Cerberi, Hellhounds and Grims.

From the union with Badgers came Nifflers. 

From the union with Birds came Snidgets, Hippogriffs, Phoenixes, Thunderbirds, Jobberknolls, and Occamys.

From the union with insects came Billywigs.

From the union with Rabbits came Jackalopes and Puffskeins.

From the union with Spiders came Acromantula’s.

From the union with Horses came Kelpies, Unicorns and Thestrals.

From the union with Hedgehogs came Knarls.

But it was the union with humans that produced the most desirable results. Witches and Wizards were born. Some were weak in magick and undesirable. **Too** human,  
**Too** breakable,  
**Too** _lesser_.  
Others though. Others were so achingly of the fey that a few trips to faerie would cause the mortal taint to fade, leaving behind a new immortal that brought fresh blood and magic to the faerie realms.

These true children of the Sidhe would be stolen away when they were discovered. Too precious a Treasure to be left with mere mortals.

Once, and only once, had Harry noticed that the Shadows called him Little Treasure in just the same way as they did these children. But, no sooner had he noticed and asked upon this similarity, his eyes had become hooded with tiredness and his body already heavy with exhaustion had given in to the sultry call of sleep. Harry never notice that the Shadows had for once remained silent.

Awakening in the morning, he remembered nothing of his late-night revelation. It was not yet time for such things after all.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Shadows are everywhere. 

We see them every day. 

So much so that we never really pay attention to them.  
Perhaps we should. 

After all, they are a state of in-between. Not quite Darkness, but definitely not Light.

And it is in these places of in-between that doorways can be opened.  
Allowing _Something_ , to creep through.

 

Dumbledore really should have paid more attention to Harry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've updated!!!!!
> 
> Once again please let me know if you like this (and if you don't say why. I'll probably find it amusing :) )
> 
>  
> 
> As you may have guessed I used this to add a bit of context to the universe I'm creating. If its too wordy, don't just complain, give me possible ways to improve it.
> 
> Once again sorry for any shitty grammar and stuff, word and google wont catch anything.
> 
>  
> 
> Also, for those that noticed, I didn't mention goblins, centaurs, mermaids or Veela as they're more sentient than most magical creatures and vaguely humanoid so claiming they're born from beasts is insulting in my books. Instead they are going to be different species of fey.  
> No one in the books actually see's a full blooded Veela (I think?) so I'm claiming they just visit the human world every now and then.  
> Goblin banks are doorways to faery.
> 
> Mermaids and centaurs reside in the in-between places so are both in faerie and the human world.
> 
>  
> 
> Hope this makes sense.


	4. Garden Snakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Words and Snakes.  
> Each are such interesting things. 
> 
> Both can be vicious. 
> 
> Snakes are often depicted as liars but in reality they merely tell the harshest truths. 
> 
> Just because something isn't true does not make it a lie.

Harry giggled.

It was soft and hesitant, but pure. With an ethereal undertone that caught on the hearts of any within hearing distance; filling them with an indescribable emotion that caught in their throats and reached to their very souls.

Or it would have if anyone human had been around to hear it.

Hidden away in the bushes, Harry sat and hissed in joyous tones with the grass snakes that had taken to calling him Hatchling. Occasionally breaking into giggles, whenever one of the snakes came too close and their hissy breath and flickering tongs tickled his skin.

For all the Horror that Harry had experienced throughout the 3 years he had been living with the Dursley’s, he never truly lost his guilelessness and wilde love for the world around him. 

Not the human settlements or the hidden wizarding cities; but the towering trees, sarcastic but loving snakes, trickling streams and flowering fields that thrummed with a power that resonated with him on a spiritual level.

It was this connection to the elements of nature and on a deeper level the lands of Faerie; nurtured and grown by the Shadows till it was a permanent part of his very being; that had kept Harry alive for so long.

 

Harry would obey the Dursleys to the letter, and only that. A form of rebellion that infuriated them to no end and was one of the few ways he could vindicate himself against his abusers.

It was almost as enjoyable as manipulating his words, so they sounded innocuous when in reality they were horrifically insulting towards his incompetent jailers - _for what else could they be with the way they treated him. They were not family, no matter what the Horse-faced woman insisted he call them._

The lack of reaction and outright confusion his comments caused always created a pleasurable warmth as again and again, his relatives failed to win The Game of Words - _and it was such a fun game. You could never lie, but if you twisted a truth enough it was easy to mislead those around you. Harry almost never won The Game against the Shadows, and even when he did he was sure they were going easy on him. But the Dursleys were easy to play against. It was like they weren’t even trying!_

Sometimes he would question if it was worth the pain that always came after, but in the end, the pleasure he took from it was often what got him through his dreary tasks when he was unable to escape to the outside.

 

Like the Shadows, the Garden Snakes were his friends. They whispered secrets to him both old and new. Of magick and mundane, and Midgard and Faerie. They were a comfort that stood by him and did not judge him for their morals and understanding were not of mortals but that of their immortal predecessors.

 

Perhaps it was because Harry’s friends were only those of old magick that he thought in a way that aligned more with that of the Fey than it did with mortals. Or even the breakable magic users.

Perhaps it was simply because he was barely human himself. A being of faerie that was trapped until something, someone came to break his chains and set him free.

Whatever the case, Harry didn’t mind nor even notice. His isolation working in the Fey’s interest as Harry grew to mirror his attitudes and beliefs on those that the Snakes and Shadows held, never truly taking upon himself the tainted and strange views held by mortals. For who was there to teach him?

Certainly not the Dursley’s. The few times they had tried, Harry had rejected it on principle. His refusals only growing stronger when he felt the approval of his Shadows.

As time passed, Harry became more and more enchanted with the fey. Losing himself in it so much that he ached to be released from that which chained him.

Why must he stay?  
Why couldn’t he leave? 

And each time he asked the Grass Snakes would comfort and Shadows would answer.

 _“Hussssssh Little Treasure…_  
_Soon **she** will come._  
_Soon **she** will claim you._  
_Soon you will be where you truly belong._  
_**And Faerie will have what its owed.** ”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm updating again! The Horror!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> this chapter is a bit weird... maybe? idk  
> it makes sense to me but then my sister says I'm not entirely there so... yeah
> 
> if you have any questions do let me know  
> and if you have any comments, do post even if they're petty. I'll probably find them funny
> 
>  
> 
> also, I once again apologise if the grammar/spelling is off but even mild dyslexia can be a bitch


	5. Awakening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pain is Important.
> 
> It is Useful.
> 
> It tells us when we are hurt and when something is wrong.
> 
> It can also act as a trigger.
> 
> Pain is neither good or bad,  
> it simply is.

It hurts.

_Drip._

Everything hurts.

_Drip._

The Shadows can’t help him.

_Drip._

There’s so much **Red**.

_Drip._

The pressure is building.

_Drip._

The Shadows are whispering.

_Drip._

Louder.

_Drip._

So much louder.

_Drip._

They’re excited.

_Drip._

Somethings happening.

_Drip._

Somethings coming.

_Drip._

The Shadows whispers reach a crescendo.

_Drip._

And then…

It hurts. 

He knows so much. _**Sees**_ so much.

He Sees everything that has happened. He **KNOWS** everything that has happened, and it **BURNS** like Ice in his veins, in his heart, in his mind!

 

Like power –

No.  
Like Magick

He is magick, -has magick! No. he is a part of magick. 

 

Harry sees, and he knows!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The only reason your getting another update so soon is because this is REALLLY short and I already had it written.
> 
>  
> 
> If you're not sure what just happened, Harry finally managed to break the seal that had been placed on his magic (I wonder which meddling bastard was behind this binding?), in order to save his own life after Vernon went to far with a beating.  
> Whilst this is a good thing, Harry's magic is suddenly free where as before it was forcibly contained and so Harry has no real control.  
> What's worse is that Harry is a Seer (past not future but whatever) who grew up without access to his sight so he never developed the natural mental shielding that would prevent his ever growing ability from ripping his mind apart.  
> Harry will eventually be fine, but hes actually really lucky that it broke now when he was 5 and his powers weren't fully there. if it had done so when he was 11 or worse 17! he would have no chance of not going mad.  
> This is why the shadows are happy. Yes Harry is in pain but he already was. also pain now is better than insanity later. one is temporary, the other isn't.
> 
> if anyone has any suggestions or ideas, please let me know as even if I don't use them they might help inspire other things.  
> Please comment so I know how to improve and such :)

**Author's Note:**

> unlike the others this wont be a one-shot as harry will still be the main character.  
> hope people like this  
> :)


End file.
